You have probably heard that FEAR stands for False Evidence Appearing Real. Often there is little data to support us feeling fearful. Our fears can become a self-fulfilling philosophy. Our minds often act on the strongest suggestion we give it. Convince yourself that you’re going to drive the golf ball into the rough and you likely will. Thoughts can become material. The good news is that this concept can also work in our favor.
In my position as a CEO I see so many people in the work place coming from a position of fear. “The customer won’t like me.” “I’ll probably just screw it up.” And guess what. It often turns out that way. Worry, stress, and doubt are often related to a lack of trust in oneself. How do we control this state of thinking?
When we act with confidence it is often because we are clear about our purpose and values. (The Character Triangle helps here.) Of course we also need to increase our knowledge and skills to make us more confident. We have to continuously practice skills we want to sharpen. And as the contemporary philosopher Eckert Tolle has pointed out, “We are not our minds.” We CAN control what we think about. Also self listening through quieting the mind (meditation and prayer) helps us find that clearer inner voice to define our purpose.
I really believe that when we view ourselves in a constant state of purpose-driven “becoming”, and declare a desired state, we will create and build to that state of being. We will put fear behind us and focus on that “becoming.” This very declaration can make such a positive difference.
Character Move: declare our purpose and desired state. As an example, if you want to be a leader at work, assume the position. Start thinking and acting that way. Identify the actions and skills, and just start doing more that way. Suppress the fears and nay sayers. Self-stating that you are […fill in the blank…] will propel you that way. Trust yourself.
Constantly Becoming in the Triangle,
Lorne